Friday, May 29, 2009

Sporcle of the Day: Famous Bobs


I knew my childhood love of game shows and Gilligan's Island would pay off one day.

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Worst...Film Critic...Ever

Armond White of the New York Press. He came to my attention courtesy of /film pointing out he gave Up! its first negative review. I haven't seen Up! as it hasn't come out yet but as Ratatouille and WALL-E were among my favorite films the last two years, I'm going to ignore the piece of crap that was Cars and give all Pixar films the benefit of the doubt.

Of my Top 10 movies of 2008, he gave a negative review to:
#1 - Slumdog Millionaire
#2 - Wall-E
#3 - Frost/Nixon
#5 - Milk
#7 - The Dark Knight
#8 - Vicky Cristina Barcelona
#10 - The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

The rest of my Top 10 he didn't review, with the exception of Tropic Thunder, which he gave a positive review.

Some films that he liked better than Slumdog Millionaire, Wall-E, Frost/Nixon, Milk, The Dark Knight, Vicky Cristina Barcelona and the Curious Case of Benjamin Button include (with rottentomatoes rating in parentheses):
I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry (13%)
First Sunday (14%)
Next Day Air (19%)
Confessions of a Shopaholic (23%)
Bedtime Stories (23%)
Never Back Down (24%)
Dance Flick (28%)
Terminator Salvation (33%)
The Nanny Diaries (33%)
Swing Vote (36%)
Transporter 3 (38%)

As ardent an opponent of capital punishment I am, I may be willing to consider it for the man who called I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry "a modern classic" and said of Transporter 3: "forget the Oscar bait, [this] is the only movie you need to see this season."

Sporcle of Day: Lead Comedy Actor Emmy Winners


Tuesday, May 26, 2009


Meh. Color me underwhelmed.

I'm sure she'll be fine but I don't get it. Either Kagan or Wood could have been appointed without much of a confirmation fight at all. Sotomayor on the other hand is a prime target for Republican opposition with her off the cuff statements about courts being where policy is made and that a hispanic woman can make better decisions than a white man.

So not only will there be a confirmation fight, but it will be for a justice who is relatively moderate. Kagan and Wood would both be more reliable liberal voices on the bench. If the Democrats and Obama are going to spend political capital on a SCOTUS appointee, I want a Brennan or a Marshall, not a Breyer.

Sporcle of the Day: Words beginning/ending in 'D'


Thursday, May 21, 2009

Sporcle of the Day: Roman Numerals

As long as you know your Roman numerals, this is just a matter of how quickly you can add them up. I finished with 12 seconds remaining.

Monday, May 18, 2009

Thursday, May 14, 2009

It's ON Notre Dame and Emory

My new favorite Mizzou Tiger, Laura Myers, sorry Chase Coffman, Demarre Carroll and Greg Folgia, is taking on some wankers from Notre Dame and Emory today and tomorrow in the College Jeopardy Finals. These guys look like pretty huge nerds so they could definitely have a shit ton of information stored up there but they also look like they'd be easily rattled by being three feet from a girl, so this could really go either way.

Photobucket Photobucket

Hopefully Laura got herself pumped up with a little Demarre 'AAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!'

Sporcle of the Day: One-Word Movie Titles


Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Suck it Vassar and Tufts

Hey Vassar boy, in case you don't already hate yourself because you had to go to an all-girls school when you couldn't get into Williams or Middlebury, you can now add yourself to the ever-growing list of Mizzou ass-kicking victims this year.


Tune in Thursday and Friday to watch Mizzou's own Laura Myers in the College Jeopardy Finals.

Sporcle of the Day: Longest ________


Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Why are the computer players on Hearts conspiring against me?

I've always thought Hearts was supposed to be an every man for himself kind of game but it appears the computer disagrees with me as they three computer players are conspiring against me. I'm not actually sure they're conspiring against me, but if they aren't, they just really suck at Hearts, which makes me feel bad about only winning 47% of the time.

The most recent incident happened yesterday. 1st place is at 40 points, I'm at 43 points, 3rd place is at 69 points, 4th place is at 78 points. For the some reason, 3rd place decides to shoot the moon, despite the fact that he's more than 26 points behind 1st place and his doing so ends the game as 4th place is less than 26 points from 100. Seriously, WTF? Why would you end the game in a manner that prevents you from possibly winning?

Another recent incident went as follows: 1st place is at 70 points, 2nd place is at 73 points, I'm at 89 points, 4th place is at 91 points. On the second trick of the hand, 1st place leads a low diamond, I follow with my lowest diamond (the 7 I think), the next player plays a lower diamond and 4th place throws the damn Queen of Spades on me. So he gives me a card that ends the game by putting me over 100, but there is zero chance he can win because he's more than 13 points behind 1st place. Again, WTF? Why would you throw me card, ending the game in a situation where you can't then win? Why aren't you doing everything you can to give the Queen to either 1st or 2nd place, even if it means risking taking it yourself? Why does it matter if you take it yourself if you're going to lose anyway?

Perhaps I misunderstand the point of Hearts. Is there some pride in finishing 2nd or 3rd? I'd always viewed at as an all or nothing game, either I win or I don't, but maybe the computer doesn't feel the same way. I don't think so though, because whether I finish 2nd or 4th, I get the same 'Sorry, you lost' message.

So that just leaves me with two possibilities: Microsoft did a half-ass job of designing the game and the computer players are only programmed to always do what nets them the lowest number of points that hand and can't strategize beyond that, or, the more likely option, the computer plyaers are conspiring against me and since they're all the computer, if I lose, they win.

Sporcle of the Day: High School Movies


Sunday, May 10, 2009


Thanks to my father, who turned into a lesbian somewhere around the age of 50, I have watched way more softball then I have had any desire to in my life. But this morning, I actually voluntarily watched a softball game to watch Mizzou kick OU's ass in the Big 12 Championship game. So eat it Sooners.


In other news, Mizzou finished up their week of kicking ku's ass by winning the baseball series in Columbia this week on a Ryan Ampleman walk-off HR. The win gave Mizzou their third straight victory in the All-Sports Border Showdown or whatever they call it these days. The trophy looks something like this:


Happy Mother's Day Crazy Carroll


Friday, May 8, 2009

Sporcle of the Day: US Pro Sports Teams

I'm not really granting the NHL as a major sports league but whatever.


Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Kansas Sucks


Lovely Mizzou senior journalism student Laura Myers channeled Zaire Taylor and whooped some Kansas ass on Jeopardy! yesterday. Well, I suppose she technically channeled him a few months ago, perhaps even before Zaire Taylor himself had channeled Zaire Taylor. So maybe Zaire Taylor channeled Laura Myers.

She went into Final Jeopardy with an insurmountable lead, shaming ku douche in the process.


In true kansas fashion, ku douche, aka Mark Petterson, is making excuses for his failure, telling the piece of shit they think passes as a newspaper in Lawrence: "It’s really easy to play at home, but you have three seconds to read the question to decide if you know the answer and then to get your self to buzz in before the other contestants, which is difficult in itself."

Here's the douchenozzle himself, reflecting on his failure:


I feel like I've seen this look of epic defeat before somewhere but I can't quite place it...

Ohh...that's right...


If this post only wet your thirst for ku sucktitude, here ya go:

Sporcle of the Day: One-Hit Wonders

Ugh, didn't do quite so hot today. 39/100.

Monday, May 4, 2009

Sporcle of the Day: Baseball Movies

I got a 25/28.

I might have to write a blog post about the downfall of baseball movies because it's been much more pronounced than the downfall of romantic comedies.

Sunday, May 3, 2009

Where Will Amazing Happen This Year?

Ok, so hopefully you've been watching the NBA playoffs. The 2009 ad campaign for the NBA playoffs has been showing a big play from past years in slow motion black and white with piano music, followed by a card saying 'Where Will Amazing Happen This Year?"

If you have no idea what I'm talking about, watch this first:

So this guy, who according to his youtube profile lives on an Indian reservation (this is no way relevant but how often do you get to watch youtube video made by someone who lives on an Indian reservation) made two badass parodies of these, which is the entire point of this post.

And if for some reason you've never seen Hoosiers or Teen Wolf, drop whatever you are doing and remedy that immediately.

Saturday, May 2, 2009

RomComs - Part Deux

Ok, so that first post was pretty hastily written, just completely off the cuff. In review, I made some pretty glaring omissions in terms of great romantic comedies from the last five years. Some great romantic comedies that I left off are:

Stranger than Fiction
Lars and the Real Girl
The 40-year-old Virgin
Vicky Cristina Barcelona

So maybe it's not that romantic comedies have gotten worse. Maybe it's just that the formula has changed. With the exception of Vicky Cristina Barcelona, which was just completely flush with gorgeous people, , the best romantic comedies now seem revolve around kinda average looking (for movie stars), quirky people. We've traded in Hugh Grant and Matthew McConaughey and Patrick Dempsey for Jason Segel, Michael Cera, and Will Ferrell. On the flip side, we've traded in Jenna Elfman and Reese Witherspoon and Kate Beckinsale for Ellen Page, Kat Dennings, and Maggie Gyllenhaal.

Of course, this still leaves unanswered the question as to whether the traditional romcom model followed by 27 Dresses and Made of Honor has just been poorly executed in comparison with Sweet Home Alabama and How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days or whether my tastes have simply changed while those movies have stayed the same.

Friday, May 1, 2009

Will someone make a decent romantic comedy please?

So I went to see Ghosts of Girlfriends Past today. I didn't actually expect it to be good but it sounded more fun than studying. I was wrong. I love a good romcom but this was complete and utter shit, and it certainly didn't help things that Jennifer Garner didn't even look particularly cute most of the movie.

So anyway, this made me realize that there has just been a deluge of crappy romantic comedies the last few years, to the point that I can't even remember the last decent one that came out. So let's run down what the last five years have wrought:

Forgetting Sarah Marshall
Knocked Up

Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist
Fever Pitch

Total Shit
Ghost of Girlfriends Past
Bride Wars
He's Just Not That Into You
Made of Honor
What Happens in Vegas
Over Her Dead Body
27 Dresses
Because I Said So
Good Luck Chuck
Fool's Gold
License to Wed
The Heartbreak Kid
Failure to Launch
The Break-up
Just Like Heaven
Must Love Dogs
Rumor Has It

So in the last five years, there have been a grand total of five romantic comedies that even qualify as 'watchable' and only two that I really loved. Why have we fallen on such hard times? From the five year period of 1998-2002, we got a ton of great ones, such as:

About a Boy
My Big Fat Greek Wedding
Sweet Home Alabama
Two Weeks Notice
Keeping the Faith
What Women Want
Notting Hill
You've Got Mail

From what I can tell, 2003 was the big transition year, where the great romcoms were phased out and the shit ones moved in. 2003 brought us:

Love Actually

How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days

Bringing Down the House
Something's Gotta Give
Just Married

So what happened? Did my tastes somehow change or am I right that romcoms just went into the crapper? I mean, I'm not asking for Pretty Woman or Sleepless in Seattle or Love Actually or When Harry Met Sally. I would kill for just something really watchable, like Sweet Home Alabama and How to Lose a Guy in 10 days.

Sporcle of the Day

23 out of 29 for yours truly